Friday, November 25, 2011

Baltimore Ravens Win Their Super Bowl Again!

Someone needs to send a memo to the Baltimore Ravens and tell them that Gatorade baths are supposed to be reserved for when you actually win a championship.  These idiots have already doused head coach John Harbaugh twice this year after two regular season victories. 

The first one was after the Ravens beat division rival Pittsburgh to complete a regular season sweep.  While I could POSSIBLY understand that one, there’s no excuse for dunking the coach after beating a completely overrated San Francisco team.

Here’s a newsflash for you Baltimore.  You haven’t won a damn thing yet!  The only thing that matters in the NFL is winning a championship, and other than Ray Lewis, who else on the Ravens knows what that feels like?  

Maybe you guys have some sort of endorsement deal where Gatorade pays you each $10,000 when your head coach takes a bath in energy drink.  Maybe John Harbaugh doesn’t bathe enough and this is the player’s way of cleaning him up.

Whatever the reason, you guys look like complete tools for celebrating a bunch of nothing.  Win a meaningful game in the playoffs for once then you’ll actually have something to celebrate.   

Seriously it’s laughable.  Maybe the rest of us deserve Gatorade baths for doing regular stuff.  Check out the hashtag #BaltimoreGatoradeBath for some great mocking of the Ravens.

I want a Gatorade bath for changing my son’s dirty diaper!  How about one for putting the toilet seat down? 

Maybe you guys got so tired of choking in the playoffs you’ll take any chance you can get to celebrate something.  Learn how to win with some dignity.  Act like you’ve been there before.  Oh wait...you haven't!

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